The last post of 2012

Well this will be the last post of 2012, the year that Ellis deteriorated very quickly and of course the year that our beautiful daughter, sister and friend lost her fight for life. The worst year of our lives. I also lost a very close friend in March and I know she will be taking care of Ellis for me x

However I will look back at the good times we had at the start of the year especially seeing New Year in with friends.

So I hope that 2013 brings comfort to those that are grieving for loved ones, brings hope to those who are sick and waiting for transplants and happiness to those that are sad.

Wishing you all lots of love, peace and happiness for 2013 xxxx

Christmas morning.

Christmas morning I awake,
feeling emptiness and heartache.
One less present under the tree,
one less person to laugh with me.

What I would do to have you back,
to open gifts, and watch TV tack.
But I know that will never be,
so I hold you tight inside of me.

I close my eyes and think of you,
and remember that you loved me too.
I see your smile and shining eyes,
then I know that love never dies.

first fundraising event.

8 months ago today we lost our girl and there hasn't been a day go by that we havn't thought and spoken about her. However much we may wish, we cannot change the past, but we may be able to change the future, by raising money and awareness for the Charities close to Ellis's heart.

On Friday as you probably know, we held the first fundraising event which thankfully, went really well. Over 100 tickets were sold and peoples generosity was staggering. I'm so glad that everyone seemed to have a great night. Of course I couldn't of done it without the help of my family and friends, they know who they are.

So how much was raised? Well the money is still coming in and I will tally it all up in a few days.

There are still some Everything Ellis wristbands left, so if any one would like one then please donate £2.50 on the link below or contact me directly and I will post to you.

http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/fundraiser-web/fundraiser/showFundraiserPage.action?userUrl=everythingellis&faId=265723&isTeam=true

Here a few pics of the evening x

Why are we having to do this?

So there is only one week to go until the Everything Ellis event, which myself and others are very busy preparing for. Things seem to be going really well and I'm looking forward to it, but and here comes the but, something inside of me is shouting 'why are we having to do this? We should be preparing for Christmas with Ellis, putting up the tree and our reindeers display, going to Winter Wonderland, Christmas Shopping in Westfield, going to the Carousel and taking Cael to Santa's Grotto in Milton Keynes. All of the things Ellis loved to do at Christmas. But we can no longer do these things with our beautiful girl.

She should be picking a dress and shoes to go out with mandy and her mates and doing what other 21 year olds should be doing at Christmas. But she can not do these things because CF took her life and took her away from us.

Then I remind myself, that's why we are having to do this. To find a cure for this bloody cruel, horrid disease and to make people aware of it and to show just how severe and heart wrenching it is. It's one of those horrble 'invisible disorders'. If someone is going through chemo for cancer, the signs are there and people know. If someone has one leg or downs syndrome, people know. The only way people are going to know about CF and the debilitating effects it has is if we stand up and tell them.

So, I guess that is my new path in life, to keep on raising money and awareness until CF is dead and buried or until I am.

Do your bit and spread the word.

Love to you all. Jo.x

Ellis's memory tree

Hi all just a quick update for you all. The Everything Ellis event, for the CF Trust and L&D Childrens wards,  is going really well. Posters have been printed and going up, tickets selling, amazing raffle prizes, from a meal at a hotel to flowers and spray tans! Auction prizes vary from a family day out at Woburn Safari Park to a one of China Cup with Ellis's picture on !

Finally, we have planted Ellis's memory tree, a japanese weeping cherry, in our local churchyard. I know it looks a little sad at the moment but when it blossoms in the spring it will be stunning, just like Ellis x

Everything Ellis

Well another month has passed by, time is going too quickly. Soon it will be Christmas which I am really not looking forward to then before we know it, it will be coming up for a year. A whole year, it just seems so unreal! I had found myself wallowing a bit so I finally pulled my finger out and with a little help of some friends, set up 'Everything Ellis'.

The aim is to raise lots of money for the charities that Ellis supported and we are starting with the CF Trust and the Luton & Dunstable Hospital Childrens Wards. We are kicking the events of with a Disco on the 14th December. An old friend of mine, Michael, who is a DJ, has very kindly offered his services for free. We have some great raffle prizes have some great stuff to Auction. The amount of support which we have received has been overwhelming and I am sure it is going to be a fantastic night. Tickets are £5 and can be purchased on line (link below) If you can't make it but would like to donate a little amount you can do that too. I'm sure it will be a little emotional too as it is being held in the hall that Ellis celebrated her 18th Birthday and Daren is going to sing Ellis's song. Get the tissues ready !!

Over the last few weeks I have also met some amazing people online, who sadly have also lost their children due to CF or lack of organs being available for donation. It's kind of sad knowing that others are feeling the same pain as me but also kind of comforting too. I would also like to mention Ellis's friend Kerry who at just 21 is in desperate need of a lung transplant, please spare a thought or a prayer for her.

Finally Mandy, Ellis's sister, was reminiscing with Jodie their lifelong friend, about a game they used to play when they were young called 'what's wrong with me'. So two of them would leave the room whilst the other would put their top on inside out or change their socks and the others would have to guess what was wrong. When it was Ellis's turn she wouldn't change anything and after Mandy and Jodie failed to guess Ellis would just laugh and say 'whats wrong with me - I've got CF' it would get them every time. Just shows what an amazing sense of humour Ellis had even at such a young age.

http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/fundraiser-web/fundraiser/showFundraiserProfilePage.action?userUrl=everythingellis&isTeam=true

Keep shining angel.

6 months ago tonight was the last time I heard your voice, saw your beautiful brown eyes and your lovely smile. The last time I got to say "goodnight sweet dreams" and tell you that you had made me the proudest mummy in the world.  I will treasure the memories you gave me forever and will carry them deep within my heart. Your courage, wisdom and love for life is my guiding light, keep shining angel. xxxx